The pressure mounts, O God, bases are loaded in my mind. I’ve practiced, I’ve laid out my game day best. 

But today I wait. 

I scurry to make sure it’s all done and pretending to rest. Today should be sabbath. But all day I fret. 

“Should I say that?” “How should I say that?” “Maybe I should go in a different direction?”

Even when I love the service, love the sermon, I fret. 

There’s an X factor isn’t there. There’s a game that comes. “Show me your will, be a lamp to my feet”  and making cranky ole so-and-so happy just once wouldn’t hurt either. 

Can you do that for me, God? I shall praise your name in the courtyard and in the sanctuary. I will dedicate the offering to your church with thanksgiving. I will charge the people to go out to serve. 

If only that were enough for them. 

You don’t care about our “not enough”. Pure hearts, joy, service in your name. Mess up, don’t mess up, there’s another game next week. 

For you are not the God of the game. You are the God of the grace. 

Tonight, as I fret to sleep, remind me Sweet Jesus, that grace abounds, love is eternal, and my desire to please you, does indeed please you. 

Amen. 

  
 A rock star from the start, the Reverend Shannon Meacham belted out a Bachelor of Arts in Music with a minor in institutional spiritual matters that most people don’t believe in anyway, from the University of Louisville. Because she couldn’t get enough of the annoying ways people say “Loueyville” she moved across town to Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary for a Master of Divinity, a degree for young idealists and middle age crazies. Before the institution of the Presbyterian Church (USA) self-imploded they were kind enough to hand out a piece of paper saying “Go forth and be an underpaid secretary in the name of God.” Shannon is the mother of two exhausting children Maggie and Gus. She currently serves Ashland Presbyterian Church in the safest part of Baltimore, the suburbs. You can find her musings about any and all subjects on her personal blog pulpitshenanigans.com.
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