(Photo by Terri Pilarski, of Chihuly glass, Seattle, WA)
God of the broken
broken by shame
hidden deep and
ignored for years
which nonetheless
affected everything
turned joy to skepticism
turned hope to caution
turned love to fear
turned anger to depression
turned abuse to self blame
blame.
God of the broken
break open now
the lies and myths
that have kept me
silent, that have
led me to think
it was me. If only I had
If only I had not
If only
If only
If only
If
God of the broken
break open this pain
release its hold
remove the grip
open me up
that I can see
and hear the
ages of oppression
that contain me
guilt me, blame me,
shame me.
Shame.
God of the broken
mend the broken pieces of me
with love, tender and kind
That I may know, truly know. that I am good,
worthy, loved, that
although
I was treated like
an object for another
for their power
their gratification
their abuse
their entitled thrust
and shove
hand over mouth,
held down
that I did
nothing wrong.
am not to blame
and there is no
shame on me.
That broken as I am
I can be whole again
made whole in my truth
made whole in my integrity
made whole in me
through your love
for the broken.
God of the broken,
break me open
so that the hurt inside can
be released and I can be free
amen.
The Rev. Terri C. Pilarski is an Episcopal priest serving a parish in Dearborn, Michigan. She’s been a member of RevGalBlogPals since 2006 and blogs at Seeking Authentic Voice
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