My heart is weighing me down today, God.
Is it from my extreme anxiety over this virus
and opening up buildings and programs again?
Is it from the need to face our own mortality
and not knowing how this disease will affect my body
if I catch it?
Is it from the 90,000 deaths in our country from this virus-
knowing that these are souls and people and stories
that have been evaporated from our world?
We know the burdens that our neighbors who are poor have taken on-
it’s for us to remember and speak aloud.
We know our black and brown siblings have taken on this burden,
losing their lives at higher rates than those of us who are white.
Oh the stress on our collective souls, dear God.
I hurt from the worry-
and yet, how easy I have it.
May I be aware of my privilege.
May I have the courage to share this awareness with my neighbors.
May we share the stories of the ones who have died unjustly from this virus.
And may we all speak aloud the damage this is doing to God’s beloved on the margins.
The Rev. Michelle L. Torigian is the Senior Pastor of St. Paul United Church of Christ, Belleville, Illinois. Her essay “Always a Pastor, Never the Bride” was in the RevGalBlogPals book There’s a Woman in the Pulpit. She also has chapters in the books Sacred Habits: The Rise of the Creative Clergy and A Child Laughs: Prayers for Justice and Hope. Torigian blogs at http://www.michelletorigian.com.
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