Friday Prayer

Intercessor for my soul,

I’ve had it with serenity with the things I cannot change.
Screw that. (You know the words I really want to use.)
I will not serenely accept that some people don’t want to do better,
That the harm of history is indelible on the future,
That I must interpret the actions of others through a lens of kindness that we both know they do not own.

I cannot do that anymore. And I won’t.
How can it be in keeping with righteousness that I should be serene about
Racism? Oppression? Ableism?
How can I be serene about the selling out of the Divine name and Divine will to people and circumstances the Holy Thou would not, could not, does not own?

I can accept that I am not God.
I can accept that I cannot actually change anyone.
But I cannot accept and I will not ask for serenity not to work for change,
Not to rend my clothing about the present circumstances,
Not to call out blasphemy, bullshit, and brutality.
I will not be serene about those things.
I will not be quiet about them.

And I don’t believe You want me to.

I desperately need a quiet moment, a moment to catch my breath, a sliver of peace.
Not to bring to a place of acceptance, but a respite where I can regroup, revive, repair.
And then I shall, with Your help, keep swinging.

Because there is not serenity for anyone until Your will is truly done on earth as in heaven.

Amen.

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The Reverend Julia Seymour serves Big Timber Lutheran Church (ELCA)  in Big Timber, MT. She blogs at lutheranjulia.blogspot.com and readsallthethings.com. She contributed to There’s A Woman in the Pulpit and is President of the board of RevGalBlogPals, Inc.

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