They said you rose. 

(You rised? You raised? Whatever.) 

You went up. 

I just noticed that you left. 

You left us. 


I’m sure it’s part of some master plan. 

(They keep saying that you kept saying that.) 

But, well, I just need you here. 

We need you here so badly. 

We need you here so desperately. 

We’re all trying to hold on and hold together and hold hope. 

It’s better when we have a real you to cling to. 

Not the idea of you. 

Not the memory of you. 

Not the dream of you. 

Not the belief of you. 

The real you. 

A body to hold. 

A presence that actually touches. 

A voice I can truly hear. 

So I’m not confused. 

So we don’t muddle it. 

So we don’t mess it all up. 

(More than already.) 

You left again. 

And I don’t know where to look. 

Where to scream. 

Or what to hold. 

Please hurry. 

To somewhere. 

Where I can know you. 

For real. 


We need you. 




The Rev. Erin Counihan serves as pastor at Oak Hill Presbyterian Church (PCUSA) in St. Louis, MO. She is a contributor to the RevGals book.

RevGalBlogPals encourages you to share our blog posts via email or social media. We do not grant permission to cut-and-paste prayers and articles without a link back. For permission to use material in paper publications, please email revgalblogpals at gmail dot com.



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